What is the most boring thing you’ve ever heard? Like, go back through those memories and there’s probably something that was as boring as say, watching paint dry or flies fuck, a documentary about the secret lives of boll weevils would be more interesting than that, right? Which brings me to Mortuary Drape and their […]

I’ve been trying to figure out how I want this introduction to go. There are times when I get an album to review and it’s like a blind date. That’s not always the case especially if I’ve at least heard or read something about them. But with Xoth I’m going in blind as a bat. […]

Once upon a time in Ireland, four lads got together in 2002 to create some funny as fuck and heavy as fuck Thrash Metal and throughout the course of eight full-length releases; including Bats they have achieved that goal whole-handedly, because goddamn Bats is fucking incredible. Does it stand up against Survival of the Fastest […]

I listen to a lot of Black Metal, and through doing these reviews I hear a lot of different styles, so it’s not a surprise that I love the absolute hell out of this album. I could leave it there, however my editor would yell at me though and I don’t want that. But I […]

There’s no argument that this summer has been the hottest the planet has ever experienced. Temperatures soared into the hundreds and a desperate population searched for any relief from the blistering heat. However it’s fall now (meteorologically speaking) and an album to fit the changing season is needed. Enter Malokarpatan and their fourth full-length Vertumnus […]

I love Black Metal, the rawer the better, and the more tortured and vile the better. The raw hate of the Black Legions in France, True Norwegian Black Metal, the fact is that every country has it’s own vital scene, using their traditional influences to carve their own niche and get that legendary status that […]

With a name like Satanic Tea Co, it must be good, right? Well, I’m here to tell you that without a doubt, A Celestial Beating is a massive EP wrapped in an adorably evil box. It’s a small box, to be sure, 13.63 minutes of Brutal Death Metal that feels like a much bigger album […]

The Second World War has been a go-to subject for any Black Metal band worth their salt. Hell, Marduk has made a career of it over the years and they don’t show any signs of stopping. So it’s not a big surprise that German Black Metallers Endstille are back with DetoNation hammering home the adage, […]

I’m only going to write the words Suicidal Depressive Black Metal once, so from this point, I’m going to use the acronym SDBM. You’ve been warned, constant reader. Shining was my introduction to this shadowed genre, I went through a devastating loss in 2013 and SDBM became my refuge. Bands like An Autumn for Crippled […]

There’s a history of amazing split albums in the vast history of Metal. Nunslaughter/Fluids, Satyricon/ Enslaved, Fluids/ Fulci and now I have in my grubby little paws this ode to all things gory and violent death. This is pure, grinding Death Metal right here, folks. Make no mistake about that friends and neighbors. Remember that […]

Marduk are a steadfast part of the Black Metal scene. From the beginnings with their more death metal debut, Dark Endless to their Dracul trilogy and fast forwarding to their ultra-military Germania and the mighty as cannot be fucked with, the Black Metal equivalent of Slayer’s Reign in Blood; you know what the fuck I’m […]

Ever since I saw Exmortus with Amon Amarth I’ve been a fan. Their absolutely over the top performance was amazing, the guitars shredded like a fucking meat grinder and the energy of the band made for a memorable experience. Following that show, I picked up Slave to the Sword, Ride Forth and The Sound of […]

Panzerchrist are stalwarts. Literally, since 1995’s Demo they’ve been putting out their Blackened Death Metal beginning with Six Seconds Kill in 1996, to the utterly fantastic Room Service in 2003 they’ve steadily put out quality God Dethroned meets Bolt Thrower meets Marduk and they all have an orgy where out pops Panzerchrist. On the eighth […]

One of my favorite things to ask people when they wanted to haggle over the pricing at the stores I worked at was “do you think you’re in an open market in Bangladesh”? You might gasp, how dare you ask a customer that?! Then ask yourself if you’ve ever done it… Anyhoo all kidding aside, […]

There’s a feeling I get when I know that summertime is here. Dread is one way to describe it, the short word answer is dread. I’m not scared of Summer, it used to be pleasant when I was younger and obviously, it wasn’t 116 every fucking day. Here in Central New Mexico, it has been […]

Once upon a time in Olsztyn, Warmia-Masuria 2017 a band was formed by multi-instrumentalist Lasota and thus Varmia was born. Named assumingly because of the historical region of the same name in Northern Poland. I reviewed their fantastic EP Prolog here and my reaction to that album was you, constant reader, need to hear this. […]

I’ve been in a strange mood lately; life has gotten tense in recent weeks, and I’ve been looking for an album to help me release that tension and wouldn’t you know it… this wonderful slab of Existential Black Metal and second full-length from one man maestro Devi Hisgen. The history books of Heavy Metal are […]

I love head-banging. It is a great feeling to release pent-up energy at a Metal show, the crowd is into the experience; each head is like those fucking drinking birds you can get at the novelty store. Unfortunately for me, my head-banging days are pretty much over. I just kind of shake my head like […]

How long is eternity? I Googled it because I wanted the Webster’s definition for it. According to them, and I’m paraphrasing, it’s a long fucking time. Eternity, the band has been around since 2003, which isn’t exactly forever… between then and now they’ve released three full-length albums Bringer of the Fall and To Become the […]

There’s been a slight shift in my tastes for Metal since I turned fifty. I look for different things now and I’ve discovered that certain genres aren’t for me. I tried to like Lorna Shore, it didn’t happen, but I tried, and it made me want to punch babies. So, if I’m going to listen […]

When I was still discovering the musical spaces of the internet back in the early 2000s, MP3 sites were my best friend. I discovered bands that I had never heard of before and experienced a whole new genre: Pagan Black Metal/Pagan Folk and holy shit my brain exploded. It wasn’t long before I was butchering […]

Once upon a time in Norway, these guys who loved old school Black Metal got together and formed a band; they called that band Heimland and set out to play the rawest, most feral Black Metal that captures the frozen forests of their native country. Forfedrenes Taarer is the band’s first full-length album after releasing […]

Yesterday I had my ears shredded. It didn’t really hurt, on the contrary, it felt rather good. The bass drum slap fighting with my eardrums, the blistering guitar work, courtesy of seasoned Death Metal veteran Rogga Johansson (Ribspreader, GhoulHouse, Paganizer) and the crushing vocals of Jens Johansson had my head banging in no time flat. […]

I admit to being a fan boy. Ever since I got into Heavy Metal I felt the need to collect the merchandise from the bands I love. I fulfill this love by ordering patches from all corners of the globe, and with turning fifty this year,I could see it as a midlife crisis, as most […]

Do you ever listen to music from another country and after a bit, you try to sing along? Like, it’s obvious that you don’t know let’s say Finnish; but you hear this song from a Finnish band, and you love the shit out of it and suddenly you think you know Finnish and are fluent […]